Newfie Jokes

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Newfoundland has been a Province of Canada since 1949. Newfoundlanders (or "Newfies") enjoy a rich culture all of their own. They are musical, joyful, and enjoy joking about themselves as much as others do. In fact, I have a sneaking suspicion that many of the best Newfie Jokes were actually made up by them.

The Newfie and the Genie

A drunk Newfie was stumbling home one day when he got lost and found himself in the bush. He fell to the ground and noticed a lamp. He picked it up, and rubbed it, and out came a genie.

"You have three wishes, choose them wisely." says the Genie.

The Newfie, looking down at his last, and empty, bottle of beer, smashes it on some rocks and says, "I want a beer that will never run out."

A bottle appears in front of the Newfie. He takes it, looks at it, and downs it. He looks at it again, and to his surprise, it was still full. The Newfie being very content starts walking away.

"Where are you going," asks the Genie, "You still have two wishes left!"

"Well," replies the Newfie, "Give me TWO more of these!"