Newfie Jokes

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Newfoundland has been a Province of Canada since 1949. Newfoundlanders (or "Newfies") enjoy a rich culture all of their own. They are musical, joyful, and enjoy joking about themselves as much as others do. In fact, I have a sneaking suspicion that many of the best Newfie Jokes were actually made up by them.

Drinking Buddies

Bob and Jim were a couple of Newfie drinking buddies who worked as airplane mechanics in Gander , NFLD. One day the airport was fogged in and they were stuck in the hangar with nothing to do. Bob said, "Man, I wish we had something to drink!"

Jim says "Me too. Y'know, I've heard you can drink jet fuel and get a buzz... You wanna try it?"

So they pour themselves a couple of glasses of high octane hooch and get completely smashed. The next morning Bob wakes up and is surprised at how good he feels. In fact he feels GREAT! NO hangover! NO bad side effects. Nothing!

Then the phone rings...

It's Jim. Jim says, "Hey, how do you feel this morning?"

Bob says, "I feel great. How about you?"

Jim says, "I feel great, too. You don't have a hangover?"

Bob says, "No, that jet fuel is great stuff no hangover, nothing. We ought to do this more often."

Jim says, "Yeah, well there's just one thing... Have you farted yet?"

Bob says, "No....."

"Well," Jim says, "DON'T! I'm in Thunder Bay!"