Newfie Jokes
Newfoundland has been a Province of Canada since 1949. Newfoundlanders (or "Newfies") enjoy a rich culture all of their own. They are musical, joyful, and enjoy joking about themselves as much as others do. In fact, I have a sneaking suspicion that many of the best Newfie Jokes were actually made up by them.
Bob the Stud
The Newfie Stud Bob liked to frequent the Newfoundland beaches, but was never able to attract the girls. He decided to ask his friend George the lifeguard for advice.
"It's dem big baggy swimming trunks, my son. Dey're years outta style. Yer best bet is to grab yeself a pair of Speedos - about two sizes too small, and drop a fist-sized potato down inside 'em. I'm telling ye, man...ye'll have all de babes ye wants!"
The following weekend, Bob hits the beach with his spanking new tight Speedos, and his fist-sized potato. Everybody on the beach was disgusted as he walked by, covering their faces, turning away, laughing, looking sick!
Bob went back to George the lifeguard and asked him, "What's wrong now?"
"Lard-Tunderin' Jeezus b'y!" said George, "the potato goes in the front!"